r/LEAVES
i DON'T KNOW WHY i HAVE SUCH A HARD TIME WRITING MY THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS DOWN. I think it's because I smoke a lot of weed. I have been reading more and more posts from r/leaves and one of the main things people talk about is the fact that they get so much ambition and emergy back. Smoking weed made them content with being bored. And it's true. i've spent a lot of the past few years bored and alone and quiet. But I also liked to be bored sometimes when I wasn't high - but I know the constant smoking has taken it to another level. I work in a job that doesn't bring me joy. I live in a city that scares me. I spend money like no tomorrow. I miss a lot of my nephews' everyday life (ie games, parties, sleepovers, etc.). I check out mentally around other people. I half-ass the job I don't love. I binge eat or just eat junk. I watch so much tv. So. much. television. But I do like the Real Housewives... My fupa is overflowing. My mind is muddled. ...